A cool gentle breeze is on the horizon. Its a a clear and sunny day and the water is still. Maybe a few waves here and there. That’s what my mind is like on good days. I am at a point in my life where everyday I am not struggling. I do not want to end my life every waking moment. That doesn’t mean I am cured. I still do get moments where I want to throw myself of a bridge. I do get moments as I fall asleep that I wish I will never wake up. But I also get moments where I breathe in the salty ocean air, or laugh at a joke one of my mates has said. I get moments when I feel so much love I could burst.
…Right now isn’t one of those moments..
Right now its a raging ocean. Waves and crashing down over and over and its such big storm nobody knows what to do. They just pray it passes. But what if it doesn’t. What if the storm grows and grows until it’s unstoppable. Till destruction is the only answer. Thats how I feel. Like I have no there options. Destruction is the only answer.
But I know its not the answer. The answer is laughter. The answer is passion. The answer is LOVE. and I have so much love in my life. Whether its my parents, friends, boyfriend, or people I’ve met here. I am loved. YOU ARE LOVED. So please think before you act and know you are not alone. I am here for you and I know you can do this. Below is a number for a suicide hotline you guys can call 24-7. If you’re in immediate danger please don’t hesitate to call the local authorities for help. I love you all so so much
Suicide hotline- 1-800-273-8255